


5 Times People Asked Rose Tyler About the Father of Her Baby

by lauraxtennant



Series: The Doctor, Rose & Josh [1]
Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: "and the baby...", "you're not?", F/M, Friendship, Gen, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Relationships, Pete's World, Post-Doomsday
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-30
Updated: 2013-07-30
Packaged: 2017-12-21 21:13:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/905008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lauraxtennant/pseuds/lauraxtennant
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set in Pete's World, after Doomsday. On the worst day of her life, Rose Tyler lied to the Doctor.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Telling Jackie

"Rose, love? Are you all right?" Jackie called, rattling the door handle of her daughter's bedroom.

Rose sniffed and wiped at her eyes with a tissue, trying to get herself together. "Yeah!" she called back, wincing when she heard her own voice come out all shaky. She cleared her throat. "Yeah, I'm fine."

"You don't sound fine," Jackie disagreed. "Let me in, sweetheart."

She sighed. "All right, hang on." She rolled out of bed ungracefully and took a deep breath in before unlocking her door.

As soon as Jackie stepped into the room, she knew she'd been right; her daughter was definitely not fine. "Oh, Rose. Come here." She hugged her tightly, stroking her hair back from her eyes. "I thought things were getting easier, love? What with your new job and everything?"

Rose pulled back from her mum's embrace and sighed again. "It is. Was. I dunno. I'm okay, it's just..."

"Did you have another dream about him?"

She rolled her eyes. "Mum, I dream about him practically every night, that's nothing new."

"Then what is it that's got you so upset first thing in the morning?"

Rose bit her lip hesitantly. "I think you'd better sit down."

Jackie's brow furrowed in confusion, but she did as Rose asked and sat on the side of the bed. "Well?"

She swallowed thickly, folded her arms, and mumbled, "I'm pregnant."

There was silence for a few moments.

"Hang on, what?" Jackie asked, completely baffled. "Did you just say - "

"Yes. I'm having a baby. You're gonna be a grandma. Sorry."

"But — but - " she spluttered. "How?"

"Mum, I think you know how babies are made."

"Yes, but — but you haven't...here...have you? But — what about...I thought - " Jackie shook her head, trying to gather a coherent thought. "I thought you weren't over the Doctor yet?"

Rose stared at her mum. "What?"

"I didn't think you were over him!" Jackie repeated, sounding indignant. "And yet you've been with someone here already? Rose, you know I want you to move on and be happy, but frankly, doing so this soon, I - "

Rose waved her hand in Jackie's face to get her attention. "Woah, stop a second. Who do you think the father is?"

Jackie shrugged. "How would I know? Mickey hasn't said anything about you getting back together, so is it someone you've met since working at Torchwood?"

She couldn't help but burst out laughing at that, despite the situation. "Mum! Don't be daft! I've not slept with someone since I've been here, how could I? I love the Doctor, I couldn't just go and shag someone else straight away."

"Then..." Jackie's eyes bugged out of her head. "Oh. My. GOD."

"And the penny's dropped," Rose muttered.

"ROSE! You're having an — an — an ALIEN BABY?"

"Shh, keep it down, eh?" said Rose. "Anyway, it's only half-alien, thanks very much."

"Yeah, but — but what if it has tentacles!"

"Do you really think the Doctor has tentacles?"

"Well, I dunno! You two could've been up to all sorts of weird alien sex things in that blue box of his!"

"Oi!" Rose exclaimed, blushing hotly in embarrassment. "That's completely — completely irrelevant, anyway! What's important is, I'm pregnant with his baby and I lied to him on that beach and said I wasn't. And now he doesn't know that he's going to be a dad again, and I'm stuck here not knowing how long I'm gonna be pregnant for, or what to do when it's born, or how to bring up a baby that's half-Time Lord, and, and...oh, Mum, it's gonna be so hard, how can I do this on my own?"

"Oh, sweetheart," sighed Jackie, grabbing her hands and pulling her down next to her. She gave her another tight hug. "We'll get through this, you'll see. Everything's going to be okay. And who knows, eh? The Doctor's pretty clever. Maybe he'll find a way to come through that void thingy, yeah? He won't give up trying to get back to you, I bet. You'll see. Everything will be fine."

"You think so?" Rose sniffed, trying not to start crying again.

"Yes. That is...you definitely want to keep the baby, yeah?"

"Of course I do!" Rose insisted. "It's...if it were anyone else's...but it's his. Ours. I couldn't..."

"Okay, okay — I was just checking, love. Making sure it's what you want."

"I want him here, Mum. I want him here so that I can see the look of horror on his face when I tell him I'm pregnant. I want him here so that I can see that look of horror change into awe, and that awe turn into delight. I keep imagining that look, Mum. He'd be scared, then amazed, then happy. I know he would be. I know he would. 'Cos that's what he's like. That's who he is, who he'd be, for me."

"I know," Jackie agreed, blinking back tears of her own as she rocked her daughter back and forth. "I know."


	2. The Antenatal Class

As soon as Rose stepped into the room, she knew it was _so_ not her sort of thing.

Partly because everyone looked so damn solemn and serious, whilst all Rose wanted to do was laugh at the pictures on the walls of all the cute and not-so-cute babies that had obviously been born to prior attendees of this centre. But mostly because she was on her own, whilst all the other mums-to-be had someone here with them. She started to regret turning down Jackie's offer of coming with her.

She'd put this off for as long as she could, not wanting to really socialise with other pregnant women in case they started asking questions that she didn't want to answer. Like where Daddy was, for instance.

 _Oh god_ , thought Rose, when she realised that all eyes had turned on her as she hobbled in, alone; _that's definitely gonna come up within at least the first three minutes._

She gave a fake smile to the lady who was holding the session, and sat down on one of the bean bags. Why? she thought to herself, as she struggled to get comfy, why pick seats that are basically glorified cushions that barely come off the floor, for pregnant women to sit on, who can't even bend down to tie their own shoelaces? Unnecessary trauma, that. She'd prefer an armchair.

"Hello, there, I'm Annette," said the lady, in a soft Scottish accent that reminded her of someone off of Balamory (she'd been checking out the kids' channels recently. They were pretty cool, really. That was an aspect of having the baby that she was genuinely looking forward to, as opposed to some mothers who couldn't bear the immature, toddler-friendly television shows...Oh. Maybe that said something about Rose's maturity, or lack thereof. Ah well. She blamed the Doctor and his Disney obsession rubbing off on her.)

"Hi," Rose said, matching Annette's cheery tone of voice. "My name's Rose."

"How far gone are you, Rose?"

 _Oh dear, there's another question I can't answer truthfully._ She had no idea how long her pregnancy with a half-Gallifreyan baby was supposed to take, but she was already nearly ten months and only looked six!

She coughed awkwardly. "Six months."

"Exactly six months? Or six and a half? How many weeks, dear?" asked someone to her left.

 _That's another thing I don't like. These people insist on measuring time in weeks. Weeks! What's with that?_ she thought.

No one else measured time like that. She just about remembered it was a Thursday, for god's sake; how was she expected to remember how many weeks had past? How many fake weeks had past, for that matter, seeing as she was lying about the six months thing.

"I'm not sure," she sighed apologetically. "Maths has never been my strong point."

They all looked at her as if she were an alien. Which she wasn't, thanks very much; she was just providing a habitat for one. She smiled at that thought, and rubbed her belly affectionately. She really did love being pregnant, especially now she was long over the morning sickness stage, and luckily the back ache and all that hadn't kicked in yet; she just hated all this nonsense that she had to talk about with fellow expectant parents.

"James and I have decided to call our baby Petunia," commented the woman on her right, patting her arm to get her attention. Rose turned to her and looked at her blankly. "You know? Like the flower?" she said slowly, as if Rose were stupid. The woman continued, "I just thought I'd say, because your name is Rose, and that's a flower too."

Rose pressed her lips together firmly, trying not to laugh. She wished the Doctor were here so that they could take the mickey out of this couple later. Because seriously, _Petunia?_

"I'm thinking of calling mine Rhododendron," Rose replied, managing to keep a straight face. "You know, like the invasive alien plant species that the Victorians planted in their gardens? The ones which are really hard to get rid of, 'cos they out-compete all the other plants? Native to South Asia, they are." She laughed to herself. She'd had to get the word alien in there somewhere; just had to.

The couple stared back at her in horror. "That's a bit excessive, isn't it?" James asked.

Rose shrugged. "It's very close to my heart. I'll call it Rhodo for short."

Annette cleared her throat loudly. "So anyway, if we can return to our discussion of earlier -"

"We're calling ours Tequila," announced a teenager in the corner, who was chewing gum expertly.

Her partner asked, "Are we?"

"Yeah," she replied.

"Cool!" he exclaimed enthusiastically.

"That's a very innovative name," commented a woman with Cecilia written on a white label stuck to her lapel (she was obviously someone who'd tried and failed to get everyone to wear fun labels so that everyone would know everyone...yeah, Rose was glad she missed the ice breaking conversations of the beginning of the sessions, if it involved things like that.)

"Yeah!" said the teenage girl. "Like after the drink, right?"

"Yes," said Cecilia stiffly. "I think I understood that."

"'Cos it's sort of poetic, right, 'cos Tequila was conceived when...you guessed it! We'd had too much tequila! Ha! Clever or what?" she enthused.

Rose wanted to go bash her own head against a wall. But she didn't think it was worth the effort of struggling to get off that bloody bean bag, so she stayed put.

Everyone seemed relieved when somebody changed the subject. "So hi Rose, I'm Paula!" announced a woman with fantastic ginger hair ( _the Doctor would be jealous_ , thought Rose with a grin.) "Where's daddy, then? Is he a big high flyer in the city and couldn't make it to your antenatal class with you?"

Rose's grin faded. "Er." Great. Just great. That bloody question again. "Well, the thing is, he's, um...we're sort of not, er..."

"Oh, I'm so sorry, are you divorced?" Paula asked, faux-sympathetically. Her husband winced, as if he knew how tactless his wife was being but was used to not being able to do anything about it.

"Oh, I know what it is!" exclaimed the brunette lady opposite her. She nodded knowingly.

"I don't think you do - " began Rose, but she continued.

"I bet you're one of these independent women who go at it alone!"

"Or are you a surrogate?"

"Or are you a lesbian?"

"Or is he dead?"

"Or are you 'just friends?'"

"Or was it a one night stand?"

"Enough!" Rose exclaimed, fed up with the bombardment of suggestions being thrown at her from every angle in the room. Everyone shut up pretty sharpish, as everyone usually did when Rose used her authoritative 'let's get things done and kick some arse' tone of voice, whether it be at Torchwood or directed towards aliens or even simply amongst her family.

"The father of my baby is a man called the Doctor; my best friend. He's a Time Lord from the planet Gallifrey in the constellation of Kasterborous, and he's currently residing inside his time-and-spaceship known as the TARDIS, where I used to live with him, in another universe; a universe which, coincidentally, I am originally from, where the mint chocolate chip ice cream tastes like mint chocolate chip ice cream and not something weird and just very wrong, quite frankly; Pete's World, sort it out. A universe where Britain has a Prime Minister, not a President, and where the only zeppelins in the sky are during wartime or on Zeppelin Appreciation Day in the year 2106, which I've been to, actually, and it's not nearly as boring as it sounds. Anyway, back to 'Daddy;' the fact that he's an alien means that this baby is half-alien, so I've honestly got no clue about what to expect about the length of pregnancy/actual birth itself. I'm trapped in this stupid parallel universe because of the Battle of Canary Wharf, and it's impossible for the Doctor to come back and get me or else two whole universes would collapse.

"So, people, considering the fact that I'm not tearing the universes apart to get back to him so that he can actually find out he's gonna be a dad is keeping you lot alive, I really don't need you yabbering on at me about stupid baby names and questions concerning my baby's parentage, when all I wanna do is get off this bloody bean bag, go home to the universe I was born in and the man I love, and eat mint chocolate chip ice cream that tastes right and cuddle under a den we've made with duvets and pillows and chairs and such and laugh about the funny people I met today at an antenatal class who just didn't know when to shut UP."

Rose inhaled deeply after finishing her tirade, finally stopping to breathe.

Everyone stared at her in baffled silence, mouths hanging open inelegantly.

A random man, who'd not said a word to her previously, spoke up, "There's never been a battle at Canary Wharf."

Rose blinked slowly, then exploded, "That's because it didn't happen in this universe, obviously!"

Everyone flinched, and Rose watched them all swallow convulsively and glance furtively at the door, as if assessing how best to restrain her until they'd phoned someone to have her sectioned.

She closed her eyes, counted to five, then staggered to her feet. "Right then!" she said brightly, backing towards the door. "Thanks for a lovely time, guys. See you never again!"

On her way out of the building, Rose didn't know whether to laugh or cry. The choice wasn't really hers, though, because soon she was doing both, completely beyond her control. She had to sit in her car until the tears were all gone and the residual amusement had faded. And then, she turned on the ignition, and drove back to her mum's.


	3. The Mother and Toddler Group

Rose bounced her toddler up and down on her knee, beaming at him as he gurgled nonsense at her. Not normal baby nonsense, either - oh no. Half-Time Lord, this kid - well, more specifically, half-Doctor; so obviously he had a lot to say about everything and nothing, from the toys on the play mat to the girl over there with the pigtails to the colour of the walls.

The other mums at the local mother-and-baby group looked on with their mouths hanging open, ignoring their own little ones, gobsmacked at the advanced little boy with brown fluffy hair rambling about this and that, far too advanced for the average two or three year old. Rose suppressed a proud grin, and pretended she didn't see anything unusual in such a young child having the intelligence of the average ten or eleven year old human.

Of course, it worried her sometimes - especially in the early days, when he'd said his first word at five months (banana, predictably) and made Grandma Jackie jump five foot in the air and spill her tea in shock. By the time he was one, he was constructing full sentences, albeit simplistic ones, and that freaked strangers on the street out good and proper as Rose ambled along with the pushchair, biting the inside of her cheek in both embarrassment and amusement at her son's verbosity.

Still, it was nice to feel like you had the bestest, cleverest child in the room, wasn't it? She ruffled his hair affectionately. "Thanks for having us along," she addressed the rest of the mothers. "It'll be nice to get to know some other mums in the area. None of my friends have kids themselves, so they don't get the whole talking about him all the time thing."

One of the women cleared her throat awkwardly. "Yes, well, it's quite all right."

"We're always, er, welcoming to...newcomers," said another uneasily.

"What did you say your name was, love?" asked a bubbly young brunette woman about Rose's own age, shooting looks at her friends to try and snap them out of their bemused expressions.

"Rose. Rose Tyler. And this is my little boy, Joshua," she answered.

"I'm Julia," replied the Bubbly Brunette with a smile.

"How old is Joshua?" asked the weary-looking mum of the girl in pigtails, who was trying in vain to keep her daughter from running around the room.

"Two and a half," shrugged Rose nonchalantly.

"Forgive me if this sounds odd, Rose, but...isn't he a bit young to be humming Mozart?" suggested the woman who ran the group, Carol. "He seems wonderfully intelligent for such a young little boy."

There was a note of disapproval to her voice, as if she was scolding Rose for being one of those pushy parents who teaches their child long division at four and sits them in front of documentaries instead of CBeebies.

"Oh, we don't like to mention it, really," Rose murmured, giving Josh's hand a little squeeze and trying to sound as diplomatic as possible; she didn't want to offend anyone with the suggestion that her son was better than theirs. Even though he clearly was. "We don't want to make him feel self-conscious about being a bit brighter than expected for his age."

Rose watched the women bristle at her words and winced. "He gets it from his Dad," she continued awkwardly. "I mean, I never even did my A Levels!"

Cue nervous laughter.

"What does his Dad do, then?" asked a petite Chinese woman curiously, as she settled her twin boys in front of some Lego. "I'm Li, by the way."

Rose pressed a kiss to Josh's forehead and told him to play with the twins, and was relieved when the other women broke out into their own conversations, diverting their attention from all on her at last. She faced Li and smiled slightly. "Oh, he's a...sort of...scientist. A Doctor, actually. Goes travelling around, having adventures, helping people."

Li raised her eyebrows. "Sounds interesting," she grinned.

"Yeah..." nodded Rose, trying not to laugh.

"So, you two married?"

"Um..." Well, there was that accidental one on Petra Four, but that didn't really count. "No, we're not, no." Not in this galaxy, she thought with a smile.

"Me and Gary aren't married either," Li replied, then chuckled, "Which did not please my father in the slightest, when I got pregnant with Timmy and Billy! But we're hoping to tie the knot next year, after we've saved up a bit more, you know?"

Rose nodded politely.

"So, does he do his bit, then, your fella? 'Cos getting mine to change nappies was like trying to get blood out of a stone!" Li laughed.

Rose shifted uncomfortably in her seat. "Well. I'm sure he would if he could, but..."

Li's brow furrowed. "Oh god, he's not dead, is he?"

"No!" Rose assured her quickly. "No, he's not dead. It's just...we were...um, separated..."

"Oh dear, I'm so sorry. I don't know what I'd do if me and Gary split up - "

"No, we didn't split up," Rose corrected calmly. "It wasn't through our choice that we got separated, it's just..." She rubbed at her forehead, wondering how to analogize their situation. "Um, it's just, he's needed overseas. He's very important, integral, really, to, erm...scientific progress."

"Right," Li nodded, looking like she didn't believe her but would placate her all the same.

"No, seriously," Rose tried to make her understand. She didn't want anyone thinking badly of the Doctor for not being there to see their child grow up, when it wasn't his fault that Rose had gotten stuck, pregnant, in a parallel universe. Plus, he didn't even know she'd been pregnant, so. "We can't be together right now, because his job calls for him to be in...er, Norway," she improvised.

"Well, that's hardly the other side of the World, is it?" Li smiled reassuringly. "I'm sure you'll get to see him soon."

Rose sighed, giving up. "Yes. Yes, I hope so."


	4. The Parents' Evening

"Miss Tyler," greeted Mrs Bradbury, on seven year old Joshua's parents' evening.

"Hello," said Rose, sitting down opposite her son's teacher. "So! How's he doing?"

"Well," she began. She tilted her head to the side contemplatively. "Well. Well, how do I put it? Um. Well..."

"Mrs Bradbury?" Rose pressed, suppressing a grin.

"Yes, so. Yes. Joshua is...well. Rather exceptional, really."

"Thanks! I think so, too."

Mrs Bradbury gave her an awkward smile. "Quite. He's able to grasp everything we try to teach him instantly. I've no doubt that he will be quite the genius by the time he reaches his teens."

Rose smiled. "I'm not gonna have a clue what he's going on about then, am I?" she pondered. "You know, the other day he came home babbling about the transdimensional velocity of something or other, and I had to Google it to figure it out!"

The teacher shifted in her seat uncomfortably. "Yes, he does often ask questions that, I admit, I struggle to know the answers to myself."

"Don't worry about it; he's like that with everyone."

"Your very own little Einstein, eh?"

Rose beamed. "Oh, yes."

Mrs Bradbury smiled, then said, "However, there is one thing that I'm finding a little...disconcerting."

Rose's brow furrowed. "He's all right with the other kids, isn't he? He's always talking about his friends, has even had some over to play - I assumed he was getting along with everyone okay."

"Yes, yes, that's all fine, it's just..." she trailed off.

"What is it?" prompted Rose.

"May I ask, Rose," she started tactfully. "Is Joshua's father...around? Only, he often talks about him, but some of his classmates tease him that he is making up stories because he doesn't actually know him..."

Rose bit down on her lip hard. "Really? They tease him?"

"Oh, it's nothing to worry about," she dismissed with a wave of her hand. She chuckled. "Believe me, Joshua can handle himself. He soon puts them down a peg or two with a witty remark. No, no, it's just...I am anxious that he is lying, you see. I am not quite sure as yet, whether I trust what he says, you know?"

Rose tried to keep ahold of herself and not get angry. "Mrs Bradbury, I don't think Joshua's home life is any of your business."

"With all due respect, Ms Tyler, of course it is! I am his teacher; I am here to be looking out for his welfare. He is a loved and fulfilled child, of that there is no doubt. You are a fantastic mother. But he needs to learn he cannot be dishonest."

"He's seven!" Rose exclaimed. "All kids make stuff up at seven! And anyway, how do you know he's lying, hmm? Perhaps he is telling his friends stories I've told him about his Dad."

"So...he doesn't live with you, then?"

Rose swallowed. "No."

"And has Joshua ever met him?"

"Josh wasn't even born when his dad and I..."

"Broke up?" she prompted tentatively.

Rose rubbed at her forehead wearily, fed up with trying to explain their unique situation. "No, we didn't 'break up;' honestly, everyone makes our relationship sound so bloody trivial. We were in love, Mrs Bradbury. In fact, I still am in love with him, even after all these years. We couldn't - it wasn't - it wasn't us, it was circumstances beyond our control that meant we couldn't be together. His dad doesn't even know he exists, because I can't get in contact with him, but Josh knows everything about his dad that I know, because one day he'll come back for us and I want Josh to be able to recognise him instantly. Well, he looks exactly like him, actually, so there'd be no doubt of that, but you know what I mean."

Mrs Bradbury smiled sympathetically at her, evidently believing Rose was deluding herself thinking that Joshua's dad was returning at some point. But Rose knew she couldn't give up hope on that.

"Okay then, dear. I'll take your word for it. I know it must be difficult, being a single mum, having to provide enough love for the missing parent too. One piece of advice though - "

Rose groaned. She hated it when strangers gave her advice, it was always so patronising.

" — don't let him believe his dad is some sort of superhero, which is what he likes to tell us at school. He'll only be disappointed if his dad does turn up and ends up being something a great deal less impressive than what you've had him believe, eh?"

Rose internally raged at the woman but smiled tightly at her. "When he 'turns up' I'm sure my son will see with his own very eyes what a good person his father is. And aren't all dads like superheroes for their kids, anyway?" She shrugged, and stood up. It just so happened that Josh's dad _was_ a bit like a superhero, sort of. 

Mrs Bradbury raised her eyebrows.

"Just a piece of advice for _you_ , Mrs Bradbury," Rose continued. "Don't go presuming you know everything about someone's life. It's not all cut and dry and short and simple. Sometimes life is complicated, yeah? It throws up unexpected problems that you have to try and solve on your own when you expected someone else to be there to help you. But that's okay, 'cos humans have a great survival instinct, you see. We keep going, and we hope, and we love. That's what gets us through. So if telling my little boy that his father has saved the world gives him hope that he'll come back, then that's what I'll do. And I'll love Josh more than enough for the whole universe, not just enough for his 'missing parent,' as you put it earlier. Thanks for your time; I think I'll go now." Then she turned on her heel and walked away.

Before Rose left, she glanced back at Mrs Bradbury, and smiled when she noted that the teacher looked suitably chastened.

 _Rose Tyler strikes again_ , Rose thought, and giggled at herself all the way to the playground, where she then picked up her son and twirled him around in a circle, and told him how wonderful he was for being so clever and brave and brilliant. Just like, once upon a time, the Doctor had said to her.


	5. The School Play

"You were fantastic!" squealed Rose, giving Joshua a big sloppy kiss on the forehead after his performance as the Artful Dodger in his school's rendition of the musical _Oliver_. He'd just got changed back into his jeans and jumper and met his mum by the hall exit. "I'm so proud of you!"

"Mum, it was just a school play. It's hardly like I've won the Nobel Prize for quantimising the cubic root of an anti-gravitational stabiliser."

"True, but I bet you could win that too — you just don't like to show off. Modest, that's you. You've not inherited your dad's ego, that's for certain."

"That's because I'm not trying to impress anyone," replied Joshua. Then he glanced away shyly and gave a small smile. "Well, except you, Mum. But then, you'd be impressed if I recited the periodic table backwards, so..." He gave a shrug.

"Bless you for thinking that reciting the periodic table backwards is easy," Rose grinned, pulling him into a hug. She kissed the top of his head. "I wouldn't know where to start with that."

"You can't help it," he reassured her, hugging her around the waist tightly. "You've not got any Time Lord in you."

Rose muffled a childish giggle in his fluffy brown hair and mumbled, "Nope. I certainly don't."

"What did you think of the music and dancing bits?" he asked, looking up at her with a concerned expression. "Was it really embarrassing? I didn't actually want to do all that, you know, but...no one else would, um, play the role, so..."

"It was brilliant, Josh, I promise. Charlie would be proud. I -"

Joshua rolled his eyes. "Mum, don't tell me the story again. I've heard this one fifteen times since I told you we were doing _Oliver._ Yes, you met Dickens. Yes, there were ghosts. Yes, you gave him a kiss on the cheek. Yes, you thought you and Dad were gonna die in a basement in Cardiff. I've heard it all."

Rose poked him in the shoulder playfully. "It is a fantastic story, though, you have to admit!"

He smiled indulgently for his mum and nodded in agreement. "Yeah, it is."

Just as Rose and Joshua were about to leave, a stern-looking woman came up to them both. Rose recognised her as a boy called Tommy's mum. "Hello," she greeted her warmly.

But the woman was not quite so pleasant in her response. "Hmph."

"Excuse me?"

"This little brat of yours stole my son's part!" exclaimed the woman.

Rose's eyes widened. Beside her, Joshua muttered, "Uh-oh."

"How dare you call Josh a brat! And how dare you suggest he stole Tommy's part!"

"Well, he did!"

"No he didn't!"

"Yes he did!" The woman leant down until she was eye-level with Joshua. "Didn't you? At least have the decency to admit it!"

"That's enough!" said Rose firmly, in her Defender of the Earth voice. Joshua hid his proud smile by looking at the floor. "I will not have you speak to my son like that!"

"Well you should teach your son how to properly behave, then! Going around stealing people's parts and then lying about it, honestly...it's unlawful!"

"What?" demanded Rose in disbelief. "'Unlawful?' Seriously? What planet are you on?"

"The truth is," Joshua began quietly, pretending to be upset. He knew his mum always saw through this immediately, of course; the fake tears were for the benefit of Tommy's mum. He chanced a peek up at her and saw she was paying attention to his acting. "Tommy was feeling really nervous, earlier this week. He told me, privately, that he wasn't sure he could do the performances. I already knew all the lines off by heart, so I offered to play his part for him. He agreed at the time, but I suppose...maybe he changed his mind, this afternoon, and by then I was already in the outfit and — and - " He squeezed a few more tears out and sniffed loudly. "And I'm sorry, I just...I so badly wanted to be in the play; the teacher wouldn't even let me audition before because she said that I wasn't right for the part, so I sort of ignored Tommy when he said that he'd decided he could play the role after all and..."

He looked up at her again. The woman's expression had softened.

Blimey, he's a good actor, if he does say so himself, he thought.

Tommy's dad came over then. "Glenda, you haven't made the poor boy cry, have you? Honestly, it's just a play! I'm so sorry, Mrs Tyler."

"Robert, it's Miss Tyler," said Glenda, sounding a bit smug about it. Still, at least she'd seemed to forgive Joshua for his...transgression.

"Oh," replied the man. "Right. I was actually just going to ask if Josh's father was around? I'd like to have a word with him. But...if he isn't...?"

Rose put on her brave smile, the one she always used in situations like these. "I'm afraid Josh's father is working abroad at the moment." She felt Joshua slip his hand into hers and squeeze it comfortingly. He always knew when she needed that. A hand to hold.

Robert smiled sympathetically and Rose winced, knowing what was coming next.

"That must be hard for you," he said.

"Not really," she replied breezily.

Joshua's hand squeezed hers tighter, and she swallowed hard.

"What does he do, then?" Robert asked.

"He's a Doctor," Rose replied.

Glenda sniffed. "Of course."

Rose's eyes narrowed. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Now, now, ladies," said Robert. "Let's not get into a silly little catfight, eh?"

"Oh shut up," said Rose and Glenda simultaneously.

Joshua giggled. An awkward silence followed, until he then piped up, "Where's Tommy, anyway? I should apologise for the misunderstanding."

Glenda blinked down at him in confusion. "The way you speak..." she murmured. "What kind of child are you?"

Rose arched an eyebrow, very offended. Robert hastily nudged his wife with is elbow and muttered through gritted teeth, "Stop it, Glenda."

Joshua took her question in his stride, however, and quite possibly upset relations between him and his schoolfriend's mother once and for all with his reply, "Well, technically I am a part-homosapien, part-Gallifreyan child, but with your state of intelligence I hardly think you'll understand the first thing let alone the second."

Rose covered her mouth with her hand to hide her wide grin.

"Wh-what?" stuttered Glenda.

"Exactly," he replied. He tugged on his mum's hand. "Can we go and find Tommy? It doesn't sound as though his parents know of his whereabouts. Which, considering they were a bit annoyed about the acting thing, is a bit weird, don't you think?"

"I beg your pardon!" exclaimed Glenda.

He looked back up at her. "Well, you were very protective of him just now, but you don't even know where he is. Anything could have happened to him. Could've been eaten by a werewolf or something."

"There's no such thing as bloody werewolves!" shouted Glenda, who then glared at Rose. "What sort of horror stories do you tell your child?"

"It's not that implausible, really. Of course, strictly speaking werewolves don't exist. But Lupine Wavelength Haemovariforms do, so be careful. It's a full moon tonight, after all."

Rose smiled and ruffled his hair affectionately. "Besides," she chipped in. "Mummy's the biggest, baddest wolf of all, eh?"

Joshua rolled his eyes. "I'm still not convinced by that story, you know. Are you sure it wasn't just Dad's nickname for you?"

She burst into laughter. "Oh, you're so adorable. Now, say bye to the nice people and let's go and find your friend for them."

Joshua gave an irate-looking Glenda and a speechless, open-mouthed Robert a cheerful wave as he and his mum walked away from them. "Bye, Nice People."

Rose tugged him into a run down the school corridor, until they were giggling like loonies. "Okay, Sherlock. Any ideas where Tommy's located?"

"From the way his parents behave I deduce that he's hiding very far away in embarrassment, Watson," Joshua replied. He sniffed contemplatively. "To the boys toilets!" he proclaimed, and therein solved the mystery.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Upcoming sequel: The Boy With the Gravity-Defying Hair.


End file.
